:D

N level.

2010-12-21T14:04:00.002+08:00

Sooooo...

About my N level.
I am totally,GOSH.

And when i mean GOSH,you all should know what it means.

English: Five points.
Mother Tongue: Four points
Science: Four points
Maths: Three points
Amaths: Three points
Combined Humanities: Three points.
Art: Four points.

Okay,i don't know how the hell i pass my Art & Combined Humanities with 3 points.
I write the wrong factors for SEQ,anyhow inference in SBQ. And My art,
I was wanting to drop next year!!! But i still will drop it next year :)

Okay,huge disappointment is my English.
I use poems,quotes. OMG so many. But nothing helps,but drag my points.
My english the worst was B4 :(
And my Science,Chinese. I didn't expect much.

MY AMATHS!!!
AHH,I'm so proud of it. :)

While my Emaths,because of neglection, drop badly.

But I'm still going sec 5 next year!

It's all going to be about O levels!

CHAOS .

My only wish now.

2010-12-05T23:44:00.002+08:00

I want get to sec 5!

Seriously!
I've plan so well for next year!
Don't spoil my plan ,God!

Next year,i'm not going to waste a minute anymore on silly things!
Gosh.

Just 12 days away to go,

Not meant to be.

2010-11-27T13:19:00.000+08:00

I am so freakingg tired.

I hope i get REAL sick.

Because i know you more than you know yourself

2010-11-26T19:24:00.008+08:00

HI! SURPRISED? I'm back.
Will post from today onwards.
I am sick right now,terribly.
Just vomit just now once. And i am not feeling any better.

I have no appetite for food.

Next week going out with my girls!
Hmm,i think now i can go catch midnight movie already!

Woots. I hope i get well soon,so i can go out.
Exactly this post doesn't have much things to say but,
next week i am going universal studio with my brother maybe?
I will take photo and post it! And my girls outing too!

PLUSPLUS,
I MIGHT BE GOING OVERSEA AGAIN..
MIGHT BE ONLY. Must see my family first.

AGNES,ENJOY YOUR GENTING TRIP. HAHAHAHA.

Guess tomorrow go perm hair or sunday? o.o

exactly,i have noone to move on,never use someone to move on.
I guess,you will forever be a disease to me i'll never cure.

WHY EVERYONE IS GETTING SO EXCITED ABOUT CHRISTMAS?!?

2010-08-20T17:37:00.001+08:00

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Oh can't you see,i'm still loving you.

2010-07-10T23:41:00.002+08:00

These three are what we girls are crazy about man!
Although i don't love korean bands. But i love their song because their songs deep meaningful.
BEAST <3

Gonna upload some photos with friend soon.
Next tuesday, going bukit timah to find friend to eat iceee cream!
Then wednesday go out.
Ahhh,damn busy! :)

Hello all.

2010-07-03T10:30:00.005+08:00

Hey people.
[Edited @ 11.34a.m]

也许痛的感觉证明了爱的深浅
不然为什么我还不撤退

记得爱所有幸福的片段,所以才一直忘记要离开

I'm totally packed man.
All for studies now.
Next week N level oral,but i'm having cough and sore throat.
Stuuuuuupid right. :(
I hate it when it comes in this type of timing.

And one week once,go out with Agnes & Shini to study.

Since school reopen,it's always busy,busy.
Hahahah. AND ALOT OF REMEDIAL TOO. :(
No time to rest or think.

Parents asked me if i want Chinese tuition. But i'm not sure.
LOL,i don't need isn't it? I only need for humanities.

Chemistry is dropping too,the mock exam was badly badly done D;
Physics,is still okay. But will be affect by Chemistry!

Everday has beeen AWESOME. I loveeee weekends.(If my mum doesn't work) ><

But somehow,i still miss you. :)

2010-07-02T15:04:00.001+08:00

Do you ever feel like breaking down.
Do you ever feel like out of place like somehow you just don't belong.
And noone understands you.

Do you ever wanna runaway?
Do you lock yourself in your room?
With the radio on turned up so loud and noone hears you screaming.

Do you wanna be somebody else ? Are you sick of feeling so left out? Are you desperate to something more before your life is over.
Are you stuck in a world you hate? Are you sick of everyone around?

With the big fake smiles and stupid lies while deep inside you're bleeding.

Noone ever lied straight to your face and noone ever stabbed you in the back.

You might think i'm happy but i'm not gonna be okay.

You don't know what it's like to be like me. To be hurt,to feel lost , to be left out in the dark.

To be kicked when you're down.
And feel like you've been pushed around.
To be on the edge of breaking down and noone's there to save you.

No you don't know what it's like.

WELCOME TO MY LIFE :)

Today wanted watch eclipse but rainning :( sad. Want to go lot 1 study with agnes and shini. Cannot too. Sad
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Just a song to share :)

2010-06-24T18:13:00.000+08:00

Wondering

2010-06-15T18:05:00.002+08:00

Money stress!
Gosh,been spending too much man.

Need to settle bill soon.
Just wish N level can end soon.

Then i can make my choice to go ITE / continue to sec 5.
Belinda have been caged man.

Want to go out with her during the holiday is hard.
Leeying went M.I.A man.

Hard to go out luh these days! Zzzzz.

What's the point of having it all,

2010-06-14T14:01:00.005+08:00

Without the person you love.

Gotta,start learning piano after N level. One of my wish.
Hmm,

This is good,
No talk with mum for a few days.
Never ask about anything.
I have the freedom.

See,
Once i had it all,with happiness.
But it doesn't mean anything to me now.

I've lost my smile.
It's over ,no point getting my smile back,
it doesn't mean anything.

Hmmm,no more overnight at belinda's house.
Because of her mum. But nevermind.
No mood to go overnight too.

But shall ask Leeying if she want overnight at my house or not.
:)

I just can't forget one thing ; the childhood.
I told father one thing yesterday.
I remember every quarrel,every beatings i have and this family have.
I never forget.
Till now. 16 years.
7 fights & quarrels.
4 times of beating me.

I still remember when,where,and why.

Some people in the world can't have happiness.
And some people includes me.

My heart is getting worser each day.
Everyday i woke up,i know i'm falling.

Try to be busy.

2010-06-08T22:09:00.000+08:00

Hmmm,this holiday is a big impact on me. Close to me will
Know what's wrong.

Hahaha. Got to go town sometimes alone or see who will go.

Need buy crumpler bag and a new bag man.
And blackberry and contact lenses. Blahblahblah.

Booom,my phone bill again big boom! Gosh.
Gotta study with jiaming.
Try to go sec 5 nor if not ite.

But i'm still doubting going to sec 5.

Belinda have to arrange her house for me to overnight!

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2010-06-03T14:10:00.001+08:00

Using back thelastmoments.blogspot.com as a private blog of mine,

All feelings stored inside,20th june. What so ever. All inside.
Guess you guys will never know.

i doubt anyone will know/understand.
BYE.

Look for it.

2010-06-01T16:09:00.000+08:00

Wow,where's my laugh,where's my smile.

Nahh nevermind. It doesn't matter to anyone.

Seems like everyone is running away from their own feelings. Pushing around and around. So love is like this.

F*** love.

Because you gave love a bad name. Last time,wouldn't be like this.

Times that i care for you,but you look for the times that i don't care.

Still can't forget the good times.
Don't plan to forget,unlike you.
Forget the great times we had, focus on bad times we have.

Guess grades are going to fall again. Can't get anything into my head.

Haven feel my smile for days.
Could have fall down the stairs today,feeling dizzy. But manage to get myself up.

Body feeling weaker and weaker each day.

Something wrong with the maggie mee?

Broke,broken heart.

2010-06-01T10:12:00.001+08:00

No money already, not going to get a single cent from my father.

Recently have been just eating maggie mee to survive. Hope i can faster work.

Broke with a broken heart.

That's why you go away.

2010-05-31T18:37:00.001+08:00

I'm a murderer

2010-05-30T21:56:00.001+08:00

Serene,get rid of me.
that's all you need to know

Think gonna skip all the art intensive. Fail then fail so be it :)
I don't care a single fuck right now. Spine still hurts.

Mum is .....
Dad is blaming me. All my fault.
Need some positive air. But there isn't any. Nobody is out there for me anymore. Congrats Serene.

Guess not gonna post another post after this. Let this be last post. Anyway,who cares about me.

心离我了，他走了，再怎么笑也笑不了.

Who needs my smile anyway.

Sorry.

Another sorry,not the cheerful me anymore.

Today only have breakfast, oh well.

From now on eat lesser ,more and more no appetite. And go out often alone,do what you know the best than i do.

It's raining and falling in my world.

Not the way i wanted to spend the day.

2010-05-29T22:06:00.002+08:00

Terrible day,disaster , not a awesome day.
Whatever.

Spine and arm is hurting badly these days.
Maybe one day i will wake up paralyzed. and how great will that be.
By then i couldn't go out anymore.

I saw you without me.

A day that noone bother bout me. 卢俐莹永远记住这一天，痛苦得哭了一场也没人懂. First time bite my lip until it bleed alot,noone look at it or care about it. Father bought french fries ,and my lip hurts. Still say buy liao then don't eat. I endure and keep quiet and eat painfully bleeding. Worst meal ever. Ain't painer than my heart.

Today,everyone have their own thing or people to accompany. Me? I neglected about myself.
I didn't know what i was doing.

Can we pretend tha airplanes in the night time are like shooting stars.

Art intensive doesn't feel like art.

2010-05-28T08:58:00.000+08:00

Hey all! :)
Previously , these days everyone was having intensive programme. It was damn bored. Me and ly was having art intensive whereas belinda was having o level chinese intensive and others were at f&n.

Art teacher was not there. And we slack all the way. Keep going out of the art room and walk around. Lol.
Even break ourselves for one hour! Gosh! :)

Gonna be the same for the june holiday as well. Yay! Rather than staying in the art room for sooooo long. :(

But i did do my art prep work !
It was nice. Because i first time shade until so nice. With the teaher guide. Hahaha i keep bullying teacher :D

Next time let you all see ny drawings :) because now no time to post a very long post as.....

I AM GOING WEST COAST WITH BOYFRIEND NOW. AND HE HAVEN WAKE UP.
Today is public holidayyy. :)

Lastly, for o level chinese people, esp jiaming and belinda.
All the very very best!! And do the paper with your best effort! :)

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Adrain.

2010-05-23T13:50:00.001+08:00

Hmm. I am quite affected by the person of this post title. Adrain.

So much things have happened to him. He lost his grandfather at a young age make me think back that i neve get to see my grandfather at all. Damn.

Saw him so happy , who bear to tell him that his grandfather will never come back again? Hais. Too bad he is at france. How badly i wish i can hug him like the past when he fall asleep on my shoulder.

Now only can webcam, can see his mun is also affected.

Really hope they come back to singapore soon.

Gosh. Sad.

Exactly want go west coast today but lazy him don't want go. Sian.

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Reason number 13

2010-05-22T14:25:00.002+08:00

Thought i couldn't make it through that night,but you save me out.

Hahahah , got back my results.
Veryvery satisfied with it.
Emaths improved a lot especially.
Amaths too! I got 40 plus over 100.
Then paper 2 i exactly pass. Because teacher give me one mark less
But teacher key in the mark already ,so mark as i fail. 34/70.
:( Sad.

Then humanities also improve.
Only science drop .
English pass,Chinese pass.
Hahah!

Yesterday went gym with boyfriend. I was slacking awayyy man! :)
Then went jurong point with him. Saw the bag i want. But no money!
Then walk around. Go arcade play! Oh yeah. I allergic to tofu.
Boyfriend say,if i love him i eat the tofu. SO I EAT LUH! But he don't know
i allergic. After that he know. He damn guilty i guess. LOL.
Then i come out abit of rashes. Damn itchy! :(

So he bring to arcade to stop me from scratching. But no use luh! Go home scratch like hell. LOL.

Hah. In june holiday,going beach with him.
And, 2 weeks of june holiday is screwed up by the intensive thing! ANGRY.
>:(
Nevermind :)

Need finish my prep work soon!

Reason number 12

2010-05-18T20:49:00.003+08:00

The one,who you can't stop asking for more love.

窗外的麻雀在電線桿上多嘴
妳說這一句很有夏天的感覺
手中的鉛筆在紙上來來回回
我用幾行字形容妳是我的誰
秋刀魚的滋味貓跟妳都想了解
初戀的香味就這樣被我們尋回
那溫暖的陽光像剛摘的鮮豔草莓
你說妳捨不得吃掉這一種感覺
雨下整夜我的愛溢出就像雨水
院子落葉跟我的思念厚厚一疊
幾句是非也無法將我的熱情冷卻
妳出現在我詩的每一頁
雨下整夜我的愛溢出就像雨水
窗台蝴蝶像詩裡紛飛的美麗章節
我接著寫把永遠愛妳寫進詩的結尾
妳是我唯一想要的了解
那飽滿的稻穗幸福了這個季節
而妳的臉頰像田裡熟透的蕃茄
妳突然對我說七里香的名字很美
我此刻卻只想親吻妳倔強的嘴

SOMEONE BUY MY JAYCHOU'S ALBUM , I will love you till death . GOSH. :D
I LOVEEE IT!! TANG JIAMING seeeee this uh! LOL. *wink wink* Hint hint.

Lols, FINALLY JAYCHOU come out album can. Another is Avril Lavigne.
Now keep listening to his song .

Nicenice,can't stop supporting. His concert,ah . Not going! :O not because i don't support him,but it's always sold out. So don't have the effort to buy.

http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=9F0E867158346442
This is the complete playlist of his new album . ><

And today Emaths teacher say i got improve! Yay,which is a good news man!
But he say can improve more. I was like HUH. Damn tired too.
Went home immediately after school and stick to my big big bed.
And now raining! :(

AND,my boyfriend is having his tkwd lesson. Gosh.

Shall go listen more of jaychou's song. Chaos!

My love reason number 48

2010-05-17T21:58:00.001+08:00

Someone that controls me.
Days are awesome and bad but you're still here.

Last week, accompany boyfriend to NUH. because someone injured his eye. Then accompany him go polyclinic first but then polyclinic send him to NUH.

Emergency seh. Then I , as a good girlfriend of course accompany him luh! Duh! If other girls , sure cannot de lor. Hahahah! Ironic. So wait for his mum at LRT. Then together go luh! :)

Then damn worried for him luh! Like so serious cann. Then got abit of memories back at ward 52.

Hahahah. Nevermind about that. So went to the emergency walk in cases. Then register . Wait for a lot of thing . Until 5pm then nothing wrong but still need to go back to nuh for checkup next monday. :( then cannot get to see him.

Then today 17th may 2010 art intensive. Bored like hell. 2 period of art then recess then 3 periods of art. Went to plaza .

Then went home. Boring. Exactly want install l4d2 but on second thought ,don't want.

Haishaishaishais.

I'm back i'm back!

2010-05-12T21:21:00.001+08:00

Heyheyyy surprised? Hmmm it's been £%*%*!? days since i last touch blogger!!

:) these few months werr damn busy, esp these few weeks because it was mid year examination. And i was damn pissed off when my birthday fall on mother's day and during examintion period! Damn hate it you know!

So the first paper was mother tongue,paper 1 and 2 and 3 . Not sure if i can pass or not. But comprehension was terribly hard. Chinese Oral was good,not bad.

English, not bad!! At least i got attempt every single question in paper 2 unlike those paper in class i always leave blanks. Paper 1,composition was normal, but scared out of topic or didn't say the main thing. :( English oral was not so good as i think. And when the teacher give me feedback and comments , she do all those actions make belinda thought she was scolding me. LOL.

Then follow by humanities,history and social studies. Ss wasn't good, essay whatever i read never come out. I read governance in singapore alot but never come out. Then i choose dipolmacy and deterrance. But i read abit of it only but better than choosing other questions which i don't even know how to attempt at all. History was soso,essay and source based got do . Better than social studies essay, write more in history than social studies.

Hahaha, then it is my birthdayyy! :)
Went out with boyfriend after long time of deciding wanting to celebrate at the midnight of 8th may or 9th may. Then at last went out to jurong point. Ate KFC. and shoppp around . He bought a cake ,everyone or everything was bout mothers' day.

Then decided to go somewhere to wait until midnight. Hehe. So damn happy seeing boyfriend putting the candles. Cute eh! Hahahah! Love him the most.

Then morning wake up at 9am for amaths tuition, damn early right. Then tuition till 2pm, 4hours of it. Then belinda ,yinzhi and leeying come give me surprise with a book of my everything luh. Hahaha
Then talk talk play play.

Then went to sleep for awhile,heart pain. Went to pizza hut to eat dinner . Damn angry with the service. There's so many seats and so many people waiting and they never clear the tables. :(
Then only wait until 9plus then can eat.

Then faste rush home to study amaths. Next day. Paper 1 screwed up . Recess ,belinda, kunda, leeying,shini,agnes,yinzhi,eric sang me happy birthday song and a cake. Kana smash with cake by kunda and shini.Paper 2 was easier. But guess this time percentage of passing is still same. Hais.

But glad that emaths was good. Know how to do most of the questions. Damn easy. Hahah.

Then today was science,physics and chemistry. Gosh i have this weird physics teacher who sets the same paper as the paper he give us to practice. Totally the same siah. Chemistry, i guess i screwed it too :(

Tomorrow is art. BORING. :(
confirm 2 hours then do finish. Guess 1 hour to sleep eh! :)

Smilessss. I love my boyfriend ttm.

Love.

2010-04-26T15:24:00.000+08:00

If you're an accident i'm going to meet,then i want to be accidentally in love.

I fake a smile so he wouldn't see. I can't even see anyone when he's with me.
I wonder if he know he's all i think about at night.

The one who's got enough of me to break my heart.

I'm overboard.

2010-04-25T12:33:00.004+08:00

OKAY,firstly.
Sorry for not posting my blog and neglecting it for soooooo long.
I try to post more okayyy?!

Second,okay i don't know where the heck my 40plus photo gone to .
But you can go facebook see for more.

Few weeks never update,super nothing to update at all.
It's all personal things. Just,mood is going downhill.

Almost every single thing for me is going downhill.

Have not been staying at home , almost outside .

Anyway,i guess mid year i'm not going to do so well.

SO TEACHERS OUT THERE,don't get so high expectations from me.

Cause i scared i will disappoint you.

Okayyy,See you soon on my post soon again.

Someone love Justin Bieber alot.
ANG SHINI,she neglected me alot because of him okay.

Hmmm,

Can we skip the month "May"?

Make me smile

2010-04-21T17:19:00.000+08:00

If you make me smile,you win.

Friends couldn't make me smile anymore. To even cry more.

如果你能回来那就好了

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Coming soon

2010-04-07T22:32:00.001+08:00

45++ photos coming.
Watch out for my post . :D

:) see you soon.

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Destined to be...

2010-03-27T01:21:00.000+08:00

A Failure

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会不会一辈子让我死心塌地.

2010-03-17T17:58:00.002+08:00

Today woke up with not a good morning.
Don't wish to elaborate,cried two times during remedial. Omgosh. ):
But still have fun later on. During 1hour break went to plaza,quite a rush.
But fun! :) Then listen to a lot of old songs which i miss a lot.

& I'm officially broke! No money no money.
Totally 0 dollars! :D

My love will get you home.

2010-03-13T14:02:00.003+08:00

There's a lot of going on happening on my life,
Got screwed.
Almost give up my life.

But own self do some reflection also.

Nightmares are still the same,not going.
Ha,but never mind.

Got photos to post,overdue photos i should say.
It's been long i never update right? :)
So sorrrry.

Life's been lousy,you see.

And,i lost my house key again! How incredible!
My mum make another house key for me,less than 24 hour i lost it.
I really neeeeed something that i can safely keep my house key.
Argh.

I'm waiting for Universal Studio Theme Park to officially open! :D
I want go!

Today still got tuition siah. ):
Sian. Tomorrow don't know what to do also.

2010-03-03T20:00:00.003+08:00

AVRIL LAVIGNE ♥
Love it. I love how she play the piano. Oh mannn. I love her hair too. O:

This few days were,crashing exactly.
But things are fine now. My left hand is getting better.
Skip some parts i don't wanna say.

Utterly very disappointed with myself,Emaths fail for the first time.
FAIL FOR THE FIRST TIME,THE ONLY FAILURE. I let down Mr Lin..
Chinese,just pass. drop from 46 to 33. Wthzxzxz
Social studies and History. Both fail. :/

Physicphysic,the only hope is you le seriously. Please give me an A.
If not,i really depress. Don't know if should head where anymore.

:/ This month a lot of thing gonna happen!
I FORGOT MY ELDER BROTHER BIRTHDAY IS THIS MONTH 16th. Shyt. ):
Then still got,N level Art need to hand in by end of this month.

Can this month extend? D:

Need to practice,let down a lot of people. (Don't wanna say who) Hmm,but i let myself down more than i let you all down.

Ah,finally today,i ate a smoothly meal :)
I ate the whole packet okay :D

Good right.

Amaths! Gosh. Tomorrow meeting Denzel for lunch. But don't know if belinda going.
And next week or during or after holiday meeting Jeren.
And This Saturday don't know want go PengHwee house or not. He asking,i dono LOL.
Still got what uh. (:
OH,Kbox with JQ & Penghwee during holiday at Vivo? LOL idk luh. See them arrange.

Love you all ttm.

I want eat my ice cream already! Bye! ♥

Tang JiaMing O: stop being lazy.

And seriously,long time no so emotional like this at all.
Last time was when i at hospital? :/
Gosh,super emotional than belinda.
Belinda say if i want be high i can be very hyper de okay! :D

These days keep going up to 7th floor.
Since sec 2,we found that place. Spend our time,happy,sad,angry,emotions at there.
Until sec 3 we stop going there because lazy to climb up.
Now,sec 4,recess always go up there,the feeling is still the same. But the place is drawn with a lot of people's thing. But nevermind,i love the feeling of everything in there.

And,few days ago,pass through Clementi,saw Sunset Way. All the drinking times at there,how we hit the floor,how we get drunk,how we have fun, blahblahblah. All gone :) I'm out of it.
Yeah i will remember only the good memories.

Dead.

2010-03-01T15:25:00.004+08:00

So long my luckless romance,
Serene,you're so useless,so unloved,so abandoned right here. You have nothing to hold on anymore, you're a cheater,a liar. A loser role model. A piece of shyt.

Nothing is for you in this world. Give up your life already,he's not coming back,he don't care anymore,he don't trust you,this useless shyt anymore.
You're nothing in his life yet he's everything in your life. And your everything is gone. I'm taking it away.

Who can save my life like how you use to.

Today,i was crazy. Seriously crazy.
Went to touch the blade,and then belinda snatch it away and it cuts deeply into my skin. I didn't feel pain at all,that's not all. I saw blood bleeding it's fun.
It's not okay yet. Abit swollen.

Yesterday Denzel want say a joke to me,i auto laugh until i cry.
I can't feel myself anymore,i don't know me when i touch the mirror anymore.
Serene feels so far from my body .

It takes a miracle to bring me back.

Have not eat,yesterday dinner,today breakfast,lunch.
3 meals already. Gastric not acting yet. Guess when it acts then i eat.
I tried to eat,but i couldn't because of my throat and want to vomit.

Hate me? But i hate myself more than you do.
How. Nothing i do could change me back.

Baby,come back to me.
I'll be everything you need. You're one in the million.

Does doctors have cure for breaking heart?

Couldn't eat a single bite,
& yesterday when i close my eyes and sleep.

It's all nightmares. I'm scared down here.
Why do you have to turn away when i need you the most.
I did not turn away when you need me.

I cut not because of anything, because you're not coming back anymore & i don't know what i'm doing anymore.

Come home,i shower with my clothes on. Getting flu soon. I don't know. I'm very sad.
Just now walk home with belinda,leeying almost kana hit by car. The three of us almost die together.

I need someone to teach me to cross the road.

Thanks belinda & leeying helping me to carry bag today.
And thanks belinda to cut together with me? Hah.

Liar asking for forgivness from a stone.

2010-02-28T21:38:00.010+08:00

眼泪只准在眼眶打转
就像海浪抱著海岸
拥抱不等于拥有天堂
最后在爱我一个晚上
地久天长天大的谎
爱到了最后碎成碎钻碎成了星光

我爱上的是他笑起来的迷幻
我爱上的是他比我还逞强
我爱上的是他瞳孔里的太阳
我爱上的是我逃不掉的逃亡

最后我只剩下了一半
身体一半灵魂一半
永远找不到另外一半

In the end,
Nobody knew,except belinda & you.

Belinda trust me at last.
But,i still not happy.
Cause,i wanted you to trust too.

Tomorrow probably need take lift,cause leg injured.
It's not as pain as the heart inside me.

Hey ,
I'm hurting so much.

I miss your smile,but i miss mine even more.

Now,i've to walk on this earth solo.
I don't want to,i really don't want.

It's a internal injurer.
Wanted to meet you,to be safe.

Now i have nowhere safe & sound,
couldn't listen to the beautiful melody,
couldn't look into those eyes anymore,
couldn't see the mirror anymore,
couldn't sleep in peace.
couldn't go out,with curfew.

If you could understand,
why didn't i told you .
Because,i could lose you.
So why should i say.

But you're wanting to leave,i'm standing here all alone.

Belinda's quote,
if loving you is a challenge to me,I'm so gonna win this challenge,if the prize is you but,who am i to win this alone.

Today,
went to bukit timah,to do something.
With,Cynthia sister,Joyce sister,Qifong brother's friend,still got other more,
don't want say why. Just because of me,i hate myself.I want make myself disappear.
Settle everything,now seems it's okay. It's the first & last time.
But i'm not okay.

Someone told me,don't cry,girls don't look pretty when they cry.
But,i'm already unbeautiful because someone left me unbeautifully.

No choice

2010-02-28T15:49:00.001+08:00

There's a difference between can't tell and don't want to tell. And now is i can't tell not don't want to tell.

Going bukit timah with my big brother now.

- use itouch/iphone to blogger

Mixtape

2010-02-27T23:16:00.000+08:00

Dad,
get well soon.

I'm really heart pain when i see you like this,
when you walk like this. It really hurts me.

You been sleeping for 2 days.
And i'm crying like fuck now.

I say i don't want to walk this earth alone.

2010-02-27T13:03:00.002+08:00

This artist sing "Replay" too. Hahaha.
Esp For hubby,girlfriends! :D Love you all ttm.

Yesterday spend 49 dollars. Gosh. Need to saveeee seriously. :)

Results next week. I can't wait for it.

Got a question for you all.
Although we don't know which paper we'll get first.

Is it better to get the better result first to be happy first then the bad results to be sad
OR
the bad results first to disappoint ourselves first then have the better results to make ourselves happy?

It's alright,it's okay.

2010-02-25T21:15:00.000+08:00

Today went for counselling.
Alot of things to talk.

Chemistry,felt it will flunk away.
But i put in my effort already.

Now all i need is sleep. :)

Now i see things clear.

生命不会只充满着悲伤。

- use itouch/iphone to blogger

One goal and aim for now.

2010-02-24T22:37:00.000+08:00

Today, saw so many bukit timah prinary school friends and a auntie who use to "take care" of me during primary school.

Every single say i change alot in character. And one say i grow very tall! I felt i change alot alot too compared to the past.

Help her take things, i forgotten about her but she still remembers me. Lean a new thing today. Which i think few days ago, people tend to think they are easily forgotten but they exactly forgotten how hard are they to be forgotten.

Physics paper was easy as my brother yesterday teach me and "force" me to remember everything and test me. So i know everything. :) will get probably A1 or 2? Haha

Tomorrow chemistry i'm scared it will flunk and drag all the marks i score for physics. :(

看开了，长大了，相通了，也懂了.

Only got one desperate goal now, get into poly / jc the best. Trying to push myself now.
And everyday i only sleep four hours siah! ):

Although chemistry is getting harder i'm not giving up and not losing abit of interest to it at all. I'm still very passionate about going into a course about chem. Although needing 9points to get it, i'll try my best.
I need sleeep!

My heart love and exist because of you.

2010-02-23T21:22:00.003+08:00

Sorry,didn't manage to post yesterday.
Was too tired.

Yesterday was social studies and chinese.
Social studies was :/ gone case.
Didn't manage to do SEQ AT ALL.
Then chinese is easy shyt. Hahaha. Should can get A1.
The words are easy.

Then took files home,then lazy wait for bus,then just in time a taxi pass by.
So took taxi home with Belinda & Leeying.

Then today was Emaths and History.
Emaths,ALOT OF MISTAKE. THE FORMULAE SHEET GOT GIVE A FORMULAE,
BUT I COPY WRONG,i don't know what the hell i'm doing seriously.
And some question trick me ):

History was easy,manage to get the meaning of the source. HENG*
Then essay manage to do some meaning of the factors. HENG ALSO
Hahah. Then after school went Hubby's♥ house. Having headache.
Then he fall asleep,then i help him pack his table leh,see how good :D

Then i silently went home,because he was sleeping SOOO SOUNDLY.
Hahahah. Reach home at 6.30?
Then parents ask how's my exam,then i say give me a break.
HAHAHAH. No tuition this friday.
GOING TO JURONG POINT TO SEE MOVIE WITH MY GIRLFRIENDS.

THEN SHOP. ♥

:) Longgg time no go out with my girlfriends to watch movie since new moon.
& Hubby♥ also! ):

AND DON'T LET ME SIT CORNER ANYMORE,IT'S DAMN FREAKY COLD.
:)

Time to study hard,mug hard. EVERYTHING.

2010-02-21T14:06:00.002+08:00

One two three four.
Four promises to get good results liao!

:) Oh gosh,if i fail i gonna hide myself.
LOL,i promise TangJiaMing,Tuition Teacher,Jeren,Family to do well.
Try luh try luh (: Everything need to try.

AND JEREN,impossible mission for me go NJC.
And stop being sad,over her.
You still have Belinda & me :) Anything sms her/me luh.
Meet up one day like you say after exam okay? (:

& I'm having bad headache and backache too.
I'm trying not to rely on panadol too much already.
Too terrible.
I'm thinking if i should go school next friday.
But Ms Rani say going to give us back Amaths paper on Friday,
hence,I should go!

Yesterday small tiff,now i'm ignoring them.
Zzzz. Lazy to care them too.

And yesterday no luck in studying too,
All i study just goes out of my mind.
And even goes out my mind when i talking on phone with Hubby♥
Cause have too much fun = forget about studies D:

Then make me laugh like hell also. Hahahah!
First time , a person only sing the title of the song .
Hahah,funny. Make me always laugh until cry happy tears.

Okay.Bye peepos. Post tomorrow again :)
Jiayou. Andddd i can't stop seeing the video which i post in the last post.
Jaychou so cool ♥

People say my life is complicated,i said it's just the beginning of my life.

2010-02-20T16:06:00.006+08:00

I'm backkkk on posting.
Must be honoured muchmuch, Because WHO WILL post during COMMON TEST TIME?!
& I'm suppose to be studying you know!

Yesterday keep hearing the song,
"Heal the world" by Michael Jackson
Hubby even sing give me hear! Love you much much ♥
The song,makes me reflects a lot a lot.

Make me cry too. Aw,it's crying happy tears.
You know how tiring is it to not forgive or notttt.

Common test,Amaths. First time,finally do all of the question.
But i think i got one question skip in order to save time?
And i got one careless mistake too. Damn angry. But nevermind.
Angry also no use,also hand up the answer sheet already. (:
Just hope for the best luh! :D

English,hope i didn't did it wrongly! ):
Next is social studies & Mother Tongue.

Social studies,Tang JiaMing. You always say it's so easy. Gosh.
IT'S SO HARD!

Mother Tongue,
I must own LEEYING AGAIN. Hahahah! LOL, must study hardhard.
Later on going 7 eleven at the opposite block to buy red bull drink? :)

2 more months/3more months!
Counting down,to when Adrain coming to Singapore.

HEHE :D

Rush to chiong Social Studies liao.Gonna Memorize all.
TANG JIAMING,i know your memory is good :) but stop gaming so much!
For sake of me & your studies luh!

Hopefully next friday faster come.

AH,JayChou JayChou ♥
So cool when he play the drum :D
One of my favourite song of his,Sunshine Homeboy!

And,to everyone.

JIAYOU,FOR COMMON TEST 1 :)

I can't look away.

2010-02-17T20:59:00.000+08:00

Veryyy tired. (!)
Pushing myself to the limit. Luckily tomorrow got pe. Can make myself aliveee awhile.

Common test this friday start. Still seeing alot of people quite relax cause they say it's just common test, wouldn't affect N level? Hah but idk think i should tryy give half of my best first? HEH.

And friendship, guess i don't need say. She already knew what's going on and what's wrong.

Family,yet the same. Not
A call,sms.

I'm sad

Don't know why,how,what.

2010-02-13T21:18:00.003+08:00

For heartbroken people's :)

Hmm,i can't find any song that suit me now :/
I also don't know what to post.
Just now went Sakura buffet restaurant,.
Feel so tired. Then i was the first one who stop eating.

Then nothing much luh. Was so bored,cause nobody to talk to.
Now feel damn moodswing siah. Stop me ley with jokes or anything sweet.

Cause i feel damn lousyyy now in a mess.
Don't know what's the feeling of Valentine day?
Don't know what's the feeling of CNY also.

Ah,don't care. Tomorrow seriously don't want go my uncle house siah. Seriously.
Argh.

Today,keep thinking about friends.. What are really friends.
I guess,i can live without it.

I'm not there.

2010-02-13T12:25:00.002+08:00

Argh,argh.
Okay i am damn sad now. Very sad.
:/

Just received Auntie Anne's email.
And Adrain is sick. Zzzzz
See damn heartpain. Damn heartpain!
I want be thereeee. ): He's sick for 2 weeks.
Argh,i wanttt him to get welll sooon.
And stupid France's temperature is as low as -8 degree!
Hell ! Betterrrr raise up the temperature luh~
Sad. Adrainnnnn,get well soon! :(

I just you need to see, losing you isn't part of the plan.

2010-02-12T11:48:00.006+08:00

Good afternoon readers >:)
I woke up at 8 plus exactly but went back to sleep?
I feel something wrong as my right eye keep twitching
Don't know whyy hahah.
&& i just found out,my 8 earholes haven close at all?

Then just now have breakfast.
And my door bell rang two times already.
Two times i alsoooo shocked. HAHAHAH.

First bell was Fajar secondary students.
Hah. Funny. because Chinese New Year then their school make them come visit
house to house with oranges wishing us Happy Chinese New Year.
Think Leeying also kana? Hahahah!

Then second bell is OMGOMGOMG. Auntie Anne send us parcelll,is the post office. Yayyyy (Y)
Andand i just notice something,in France they spell Singpore as Singapour?! LOL
Love it. Thennn i see adrain's drawing? Hahaha. Okay it might be nothing to you all.
But mean a lot a lot to me okay? I've been looking to May of this year,to just be alive as one piece to see Adrain! I can't wait for him to call me Jiejie again .
Cause noone have call me like this before,only him. Cause i don't have any silbing younger than me? And others just call me by sister? And only adrain call me jiejie! Love him!

The only reason i'm here is,you and you . Hahahah go figure the you.
Okay,i cryyyy happily when i saw adrain's thing. Can feel he's here. But ah. I miss him :/
It hurt so bad sometimes
not having you here..

I'm thinking to changeee to livejournal :/
Don't know if i should or not. Hahah. Anyway,changing blogskin soon?
To white background perhaps.

Later still need chiong homework,i seriously don't feel like tuitioning
I feel like running away from tuition :P

Hit and goodbye.

2010-02-11T22:18:00.002+08:00

Friends come and go?
So sorry.
It's not only me.

Enoughhh,i just need belinda and that's enough. I believe belinda only need me too! :D love ttm. Really million thanks! Thanks for willingly to be my lesbian ? HAAHAH. yeahhh right. Hope this 3 years friendship will continue all the way?

Hahhah. Leeying,i'm just grateful enough we manage to find back our 5years of friendship because i wanted to still be with you! Lovelove ttm. (: i've spend one quarter of my life with you?

I still miss the way,how we shout scream at the canteen, how we sit at the detention area together ,how we disiao the suki, how we get crazy like there's no tomorrow. How we hit the mall together,how we share little secrets. But soon all this become betrayal,disloyal, backstab.

My heart is fried.

2010-02-09T16:27:00.003+08:00

Love this song luh! :D
Youuu see the lyrics :O
My current alarm song too .

Tired luh this few days.
Totally stress out. Emotional is getting out of hand,someone help!
):

Didn't manage to spend time with hubby this few days? Because he got rehearsal.

Now i felt so sick of life. :/

2010-02-07T20:09:00.000+08:00

At zhcc now

- use itouch/iphone to blogger

Because..

2010-02-07T14:05:00.001+08:00

Let the picture say it all.

I'm nothing without you.

2010-02-05T22:52:00.003+08:00

Read the lyrics.

I wish to go your house and run to you and have a big cry. But

Noone will/should/would/could/do care for me anymore .

Just let this heart froze to death let it die away.

Reason number #643

2010-02-05T19:23:00.002+08:00

At first i was falling like a domino,
Until you save me. & Now you come swept me off my feet.

Today walk home with belinda,
Come across Stevie Hoang de

Hah,then i remember when he left me,i was hearing that song.

:) But aiya,i don't care anymore.
What i care is now.
Then talk to Belinda & Leeying awhile.
Saw someone very familiar,then he shout my name :O
Then it was ChowChin. Hah~ Meet him soon next time.

Going to Amaths Tuition soon!
Let me tell you something let me tell you something!

I FINALLY GET THE HAND OF TRIGO ON MY OWNZXZXZ! YAY! (Y)
Andand I bet this time,It would have a F9 On my amaths paper anymore!

2010-02-04T22:46:00.001+08:00

Thanks for tearing me apart again and again and again.

3rd day already. And... I don't know. I'm just sad.

- use itouch/iphone to blogger

Because of you & love,i never look back to the past again.

2010-02-04T17:21:00.003+08:00

Saw this at Huilin's blogpost,which i found it literally true.
& speaks out girl's mind.

- When she starts cursing at you trying to act all tough,
kiss her and tell her you love her.

- When she’s quiet,
ask her whats wrong.

- When she ignores you,
give her your attention.

- When she pulls away,
pull her back.

- When you see her at her worst,
tell her she’s beautiful.

- When you see her start crying,
just hold her and don’t say a word.

- When you see her walking,
sneak up and hug her waist from behind.

- When she’s scared,
protect her.

- When she steals your favorite hoodie,
let her keep it and sleep with it for a night.

- When she teases you,
tease her back and make her laugh.

- When she doesn’t answer for a long time,
reassure her that everything is okay.

- When she looks at you with doubt,
back yourself up.

- When she says that she loves you,
she really does more than you can understand.

- When she grabs at your hands,
hold her’s and play with her fingers.

- When she bumps into you,
bump into her back and make her laugh.

- When she tells you a secret,
keep it safe and untold.

- When she looks at you in your eyes,
don't look away until she does.

- When she says it’s over,
she still wants you to be hers.

When she reposts this bulletin,
she wants you to read it.

- Stay on the phone with her even if she’s not saying anything.
- When she’s mad hug her tight and don’t let go.
- When she says she’s ok don’t believe it, talk with her because 10 yrs later she’ll remember you.
- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her.
-Treat her like she’s all that matters to you.
- Stay up all night with her when she’s sick.
- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think it’s stupid.
- Give her the world.
- Let her wear your clothes.
-When she’s bored and sad, hang out with her.
-Let her know she’s important.
- Don’t talk about other girls around her.
- Kiss her in the pouring rain.
- When she runs up to you crying, the first thing you say is:
“Whose ass am i kicking baby?”

* A guy has a crush on a girl. He follows her wherever she goes.
* Girl: Why do you keep on following me?
* Boy: Because you’re so pretty and I think I’m falling in love with you.
* Girl: Really? But you haven’t met my friend yet. She’s prettier than me and she’s right behind you.
* Boy: (Looks behind but finds no one) Are you making fun of me? There’s no one behind me.
* Girl: No, but if you really love me, you wouldn’t look back.

Days have been way too boring this few days.
Homeworks Homeworks Homeworks.
Amaths isn't good,still getting 0 for class tests. I don't know how to continue.
I don't even know how to push myself. I need a break. ):

Reason number #736

2010-02-01T22:03:00.000+08:00

His smile that can light up my life.

Just a quick update about my lifeeee. Okay i've complains okay! That my blog long long time no picturessss/photos. (: soonsoon.

Because life's have been rushing! And busy. Screwed up,happy times, all have been through already. This year isn't good at all.

I have to chiong for common test already. I'm exactly veryvery worry my results will come out bad. I don't want see a F9 on my any subjects including amaths! So i need to pull up my sock now! Zzz i have miss alot of lesson thanks to my wonderful sick.

Now i have to catch up double hard. Hah, have not shop for CNY clothes too, everything have been delay!
Last year already settle this type of thing during december.
And i found out i have alot of tanktop .

Tomorrow don't know should go imm with agnes or not. Mum going malaysia to help me buy p.s i love you and thanks for the memories! I can't wait!

(: life's getting excitingggg! :D
Lastly and not lately,
I love my hubby, tang jiaming ^_^v!

Reason for my love, #193

2010-01-30T23:26:00.001+08:00

Cause i only got one time of life,one life of breathe & one heart to love you.

Like you never knew me.

2010-01-29T17:14:00.003+08:00

15 years.
8 months,20 days.

3 relationships.
You never seem to like know me all this time,all these years.
All the 10 months inside you.

You never let me go the way i wanted,
You never let me be,at sometimes,you were never on the same thinking with me.
You don't know me at all.
Don't you feel like you don't know your daughter at all.
You know i wouldn't heed your advice.
You know you wouldn't be one the same path with me.
Is all about you,this is my life.
I'm going-to-be 16. I'm not small. Can i do one decision on my own.
Just once.

I don't see the point of being daughter anymore..
You can't seem to know me at all,i can't seem to get along with you anymore.

At first,I still even though,in this family Only you can understand me
Now,it's just like Nobody in the house understand what i'm thinking at all,
understand how i want live my life already,never know how mature have i grown.
How many steps have i took till here. You all never seem how i've come here.

And,till now. You still don't get it.
How many more steps can i take,to get the attention of your eyes on one step.
But,how much more can i take it now..

I really don't know how open my mouth to you.
You seem to trust all those people's advice outside more than your daughter.
Why don't you call them your daughter.

My half.

2010-01-28T14:25:00.001+08:00

Open heart,open love,i saw you.

2010-01-28T11:14:00.004+08:00

First time,cried at polyclinic.
First time,ask stupid doctor for a cure for heart.
And the doctor give me sweet .___. wth.

Replayyyy.

Forcing myself to eat,guess i need to stick to porridge first.

I'm crying listening to this song. Super crying like Zzzz.

I miss .......,i want to cry on ...but am i allowed to..?

Now i've nothing.
Should i go ITE now.
Waiting to get expelled.

Number #452

2010-01-27T22:13:00.003+08:00

Because you were not like him,you are never even a bit of him.
& and i never love him like how i love you
Believe it or not,that's you to me. Lovable.

我知错了。

2010-01-27T09:25:00.001+08:00

Even all of the bad songs ain't so bad, i just wish there's much more than that about me and you.
But if i say hello, is your inside screaming i love you.

Don't walk away when i still love you. Imyvm.

If i could, i want to runaway to somewhere where i can be with you.

But,you don't seems you want it anymore.
I ain't giving up on love yet.

求求你别这么想
我愿意
你可以把我藏起来
放在心里面不让别人想起
只准和你在一起

Put this blog back to public,
create another private blog for myself.

I miss you very much.

2010-01-26T18:52:00.001+08:00

Having fever. Just now go polyclinic. Dreaming away.
I took the wrong medicine that i'm allegric with . Now condition worsen.
Later going to bukit batok to see doctor not polyclinic this time.
The worst time ever.

All i can say i really need you now.

Hot mess

2010-01-26T10:02:00.000+08:00

The truth is i don't know what to do at all w/o you.

I don't need to let you know how it feels like waking up in the night w/o you cause you know how it feels.

If i'm falling i know you wouldn't let me hit the ground.

Coughcough all my life awayyy ):

Not happy at all. Still having fever. Not going to school for two to three days. I don't know see first ):

Stayyy.

Gonna make my way to see doctor soon alone later.

- use itouch/iphone to blogger

Reason for my love, #285

2010-01-22T23:43:00.002+08:00

Waking up & think of you makes a good start for the day.

Just now tuition,
Freaking greattt,i lost my voice now totally.
And just now tuition i just can nod and shake my head
If don't understand i point out,LIKE I'M DUMB SIAH!
-.-

Wonder when will my voice can come back,
If my voice is like this forever,SERIOUSLY
SERIOUSLY,i'm going to jump out of the window in my room.
Zzzzz. Seriously pissed off.

Anddd byee long hair and fringe,
Hellllooo short hair and bangs. LOL

Tomorrow wait for hubby come my house to study,
then at night steamboat buffet withhhh hubby & family.

At least i have something to look forward tomorrow. Hehe!

Reason for my love,#382

2010-01-19T22:58:00.000+08:00

When i'm emptied ,you come fill me up with your love.

Oh gosh, it's honework rushhh you all knowww lols . I still got lots of undone homeworks .

Still owe alot of homework to miss chang. I'm so dead.

And in this freaking time i'm sickkk. Now somebody scold me for not doing homework when i was good health.

Plusss just now rush up to leeying's house to print art's thing. I choosen pop art. Was exactly thinking of abstract art or something. But i don't know how to start it so took pop art.

Thennn leeying told me she went belinda house to study. Damn sad! Cause i was unable to go. But if i'm able i alsi don't know if they will ask me to go or not. Told leeying i'm serious in this year. The reason why i didn't choose to sit with you all is i don't want play around with you all anymore.

Lol heard leeying say belinda and her anyhow do ss homewok make me feel like a nerd luh. Cause i was serious in doing that homework. How i wish i can slack with them. But if it was sec 3 it'll be absolutely okay. But now, time to get serious.

Promised hubby not to get ite
Don't want let down my family
Hubby coming my house every saturday to "encourage" me in studying. He is very supportive!

Thennn i'm feel very stress too and i trying to pull and give pressure to myself. Of course i still know how relax at times (:

Love
You
All!

- use itouch/iphone to blogger

I'm officially sick! Omg

2010-01-18T20:19:00.001+08:00

我很好那么你呢？以前离开你是要比从前快乐。
我们会幸福的.

- use itouch/iphone to blogger

Reason for my love , #67

2010-01-17T10:34:00.003+08:00

Because I couldn't go,I get deeper whenever he says he loves me & it melts my heart.

OMGOMGOMG,
LOOK AT THIS

AVRIL LAVIGNE IS COMING OUT ALBUM,i'm so going to buy her album ! WEEPEEE,waiting for her album for very long already :D YESYESYES! Damn happy.
HAHAHAHA.

And this is another guy who do songs much more than the originals! Hah,i love how he edit those songs OMG,so nice. Esp his pop "I'm better than your boyfriend" that's Jasmin recommend . Nicenice. (:

Reason for my love #125

2010-01-16T09:53:00.003+08:00

That strong sense of love that doesn't make me miss/want the past anymore.

I'm so awake now in this time,when i should be sleeping! I don't know why.
I need to studystudystudy!
I just love Tang JiaMing! ♥
Heeheee.

Last call last call!

2010-01-14T22:33:00.002+08:00

Dayssss are great .
(:

Todayyy, Started off with a -.- went for AVA duty okay!
Guess what? Get chased out. WTF can. Issac was okay,good boy LOL.
But that Kimfei is like a fuxking bitch i have ever seen. -.- I want slapp her.
Mr Lye chase belinda & gina & leeying,then i want go up take thing.
Then he say stopstopstop, I say "stop what luh,i on duty,i want go up take my bloody sketch book,is it you don't let me go art class first?!"
Then he okayokay! go up go up. Then i hear he scolded belinda and co off. Wth~
Damn pissed off -.- went to classroom
English lesson doing papers. Quite boring,but to me. Better than reading out loud to teacher .___.
Then it is Emaths lesson. Mr Lin keep aiming me and Junqiang luh!

Recess nothing much,spend time with hubby & girlfriends.
Then went for Art. Boringggg,i almost want to vomit when i mix the colours! So disgusting!
Finally end lesson then went for Chinese lesson,Junqiang & I was laughing the lesson away, lol!
Last lesson was Chemistry,the test,i'm going to fail it soon! Butttt,the worksheet teacher say my chemistry rockssss! No luh joking (: She just say i am able to do the questions which others can't, then she was surprise,then i say i ownself do de luh! .___.

Tomorrow no pool! ARGH, shag.
Nvrmind,now seeing if kerby & hubby want go study or not luh! ):
If not i will be sleeping my afternoon nap tomorrowwww. :)

&&&&

LAST CALL,give me your email.
I'm going to private soon!

Rushing love bullets.

2010-01-13T20:07:00.002+08:00

Just a fast post/rather a rushhhh post! Hah!

Today went to hubby's house to so called do "homework" -.-
LOL, and i'm crashed by homeworks these days.
Tomorrow tuition, omg.
And next week,Thursday counselling? (:
Tomorrow still got a chemistry test ah,wtf!
I'm so totally stress,but i'm still serious in my work now!

I can't wait friday to come omgod.
Days are getting exciting,and suddenly i fell like saying
I LOVE PHYSICS! ♥ okay, whatever,but i just love it not the teacher :D
Oh gosh,now i'm mixed up . Amaths,please connect with me,please have some sparks on me!
-.-

Then emaths,is getting blurer and blurer. Need bulk up soon!
Chinese,is still as easy. Chemistry,slowing down. Need to fasten up!
Art,OMG. NEEED RUSHHH TRAIN! Humanities,someonekillme please.

Zzzzz,tang jiaming! Next time better study properly luh! ARGH (:
Gina goh,focus on your studies now okay? Don't think too much.
You still got alot of people care,like me! OMG,i'm so thick skin . Pof.
I wish to do the mending luh! But someone snatch my job :/ STUPIDDD.
Love youuuuuu ttm. Stop thinking farfar . Just take a deep sleep.
Cannot sleep sms me!

I love Tangjiaming!!!

2010-01-12T17:22:00.002+08:00

This few days, very sad D:
Because my hubby don't have time for me and didn't send me home.

Then. he also got some problems in school, I don't want to elaborate.
But matter what, i still love him :D

Is it me.

2010-01-11T18:56:00.001+08:00

Not feeling well. Sore throat.
And just got cut on my hand from some sharp branches. Pain and bleeding.

Need a long rest.

- use itouch/iphone to blogger

I never thought it be like this.Don't.

2010-01-10T13:09:00.004+08:00

You will see me lesser in school,
More in pub & clubs.

You will see me in school,
But i don't care about studying.

You will see me not at home,
You will see me smoking away my life.

You will not that Serene anymore,
I have grounded her from life already.

You will not see her smile ever again,
you will see her cry every single moment,min,secs.

You will see her eat,drink,sleep.
But exactly she is vomitting,drinking alcohol,relying on sleeping pills to sleep.

Cause that Serene,wants to die when she don't have love anymore.

This is my last promise if you go.

What if

2010-01-10T08:28:00.003+08:00

Good morning for you all,goodnight for me.
I couldn't sleep,couldn't eat,couldn't smile.
Just because for waiting for that one message saying everything is alright.
But turns out not that person who sms me.

Because you said you mind my past,
Because people say you're good,i'm ruining your bright future.
Because people trust you,and not me.
Because you don't see our future,i don't know if your future have me.

All i care is your words,but your words doesn't warm me.

Can you believe i exactly cross the road blindly 4 times.

And this cat,follow me till i got home yesterday.
& Staying up this late to wait for one person ,
& i guess if i never message,you will never message me.

So am i being the one who have a wishful thinking .

Need you now. Cause i am my only worst enemy

Fcuk my lifezxzxzxz!

2010-01-09T19:16:00.002+08:00

Zzzzzzz

Fcukfcukkkkk.
I'm so seriously fcuked up.
Don't know what to do. Feel like saying everything at once but i can't.
Life is getting so fcuking hard.

Mum is controlling me like FUCK,you can rather ground me lorh .
-.- I'm seriously so pissed and FML.

Schools ain't any better,seriously. Only tomorrow to rest.
Zzz.

Never work out right.

My love is for you.

2010-01-05T17:16:00.003+08:00

Today started off with a tired day ARGH.
I slept until my handphone alarm rang! How amazing/pathetic can that be?!

Then went to Segar LRT to meet boyfriend.OHOH,forgot to payy you uh!
Got saveeee money? (:
Then went to school,we were like rushing luh! Cause almost late?
Saw leeying at the gate duty Hah,she was surprised.
Then went to hall,sit down . Read handbook like wth. Then chatted away.
Almost caught my skirt :O

And my ear stud goneeee~ Sian.
Went to class,first lesson is English. Saw both teacher,i was damn sian.
100 words spelling,don't even know can pass it or not :/

After that wassss,Amaths. Oh fcuk my life.
I'm very disappointed in myself. .___. Envy my elder brother.
Just can't do as well as like my brother. Amaths,guess i have to just give up.
And focus on Emaths . Still quite pissed off with myself.

Was quite a bad mood already by then,went downstair with kunda,saw Jiayu Chiobu,talked to her. Then she also call me drop too. Also don't know what to do.
Then kunda just keep making me laugh luh! OMG. Then went for chinese lesson.

EVEN MORE PISSED OFF,we were separated. OH HELL,now me & Momoko are the only girls in 3G. Like hell siao. EOY i got highest why i go there siah .___.
But i only know that, mum confirm will call school . HAHA,i want see my mum scold . HEHE. Is like ridiculous luh! ALL BOYS,two girls. -.-

SUPER DUPER PISSED OFF,after that Physics,nothing much. Just about WAVES .___.
Thenthen talked to belinda,i understand i understand how you feeling (:
Social studies,just talked about dropping us to N level syllabus.
CD,just wasting time away,went to hall AVA. Took control of the laptop was so fcuking troublesome -.- NEXT SLIDE NEXT SLIDE NEXT SLIDE,SLOW DOWN SLOW DOWN SLOW DOWN. HELLO! I'M NOT IDIOT,I KNOW IT OKAY!

-.- Went to pay locker fee after that,and request to change lock as i lost one of the keys,and boyfriend wants the key Hahah (: Giving him the key tomorrow if he follow me go take ? Hah. Went plaza with boyfriend & my girls to buy things. Home sweet home after that.

& Guess what i found after i took out my shoe? Myyyy feet was bleeding with lots of blood . & i think it has been bleeding very long,and was still bleeding LIKE WALAO,damn disgusting . My blood is supersuper red. Zzzz . That means i'm still healthy okay! I'm not always sicksicksick.

LOL.
Tomorrrrrow,seriously don't want go school but cannot don't go.
Cause Elder brother sure gan me to school ):

Going to private my blog soon,or creating a private blog. If you wanttt,giveee me your bloody google emails,my dears! :D Cause i don't know what email you are using!

DON'T SAY I NEVER INVITE YOU,I'M ASKING FOR YOUR EMAIL NOW.

Seems so easy,yet so hard.

2010-01-04T21:58:00.000+08:00

Eheh, stress coming. Today art lesson was a disaster! Argh talk about it i am very angry.

Leeying went orientation so left me alone. Thanks to obama and yinzhi and yu ren and wee kiong and peng hwee. Lol all guys i also don't why cause they just join in the fun.

Thenn we were keep playing with pails full of water when we were suppose to be painting! And i found out our paintings have really deproved alotalot. I very screwed by it.

Ah, and my english now is like kanasai. Gotta contact my tuition teacher soon, for emaths and amaths. I miss mummy and daddy alotalot. Faster come back please mummy i got alot of things to tell to you.

Elder brother has been treating me veryvery good and take good care of me maybe he knows somethings wrong with me. Just now he called pizza hut delivery for dinner. And i could not eat much too. He help me wash my shoe like it take forever to ask him help me wash. Hahah thanks!

As for eldest brother, don't want to talk about it. Chatted with gina pearlyn and belinda about it, don't know leh . See how first. I don't want hurt both sides if want, i rather hurt myself first.

After that accompany belinda meet lawrence around fajar sec
They damn argh! Then went home my fever was like 41plus?went take a cold shower?! I don't know what the hell i was doing. Went to bed with wet hair!? Ah.

Hope tomorrow fever don't disturb me anymore. If not i will emo de!

Daddy! Happy birthday!!!! i know you're at genting enjoying the breeze! While your baby daughter is here suffering. Fasterrr come backk i want a big hug.

- use itouch/iphone to blogger

Getting lost

2010-01-04T19:20:00.001+08:00

Sick sick sick. Fcuk.
Can hardly breathe and heavy headache.

Forcing myself to do things now, tomorrow don't know want go school or not ,probably force myself to wake up.

Gastric gastric is getting worser and double pain. But who fcuking care anyway.

Now so alone. Thanks

- use itouch/iphone to blogger

SereneLohLiYing,where are you.

2010-01-03T14:08:00.003+08:00

Where are you,i can't find you.
Still trying hard to find myself back.
Hell. It just went missing.

Don't know where's that,Serene anymore.
Still trying to find her still,but..
Every time when i almost could have found her,
Something just brings me down again.

Fcuk -.-
Slept less than 7hours these two days.

And all i ever wanted is for you to know,everything i do i gave my heart & soul.

2010-01-02T23:00:00.004+08:00

The pieces of my heart are missing you,
The face i came to know is missing you too.
All the words i need to hear always kept me thru the day.
I miss you.

I can hardly breathe,i need to feel you here with me.

Reflections

2010-01-02T16:57:00.004+08:00

Okay i know it's veryyyy late to do reflections on 2009 when i suppose to do it during new year! But i slept my new year whole dayy. What a niceeeee day to start the year.

Okayokay,basically 2009 is a damn pathetic year for me ,you readers must be wondering like o.o?! LOL,only close friendsss know (:

I lost a boyfriend,i gain a boyfriend LOL. Should i say that?
Shy die me. D:

Okay,how about i lost a bastard and gain a gentleman.
Hmmm. Not right not right .
Whateverrr it will be,i just lost JonathanTanLiWei out of my life,
&& TangJiaMing step into my lovelife OKAY!? :)

On 2009,i had.
1) Wash my mp3 inside together with my clothes!(Gone case)
2) Lost my handbag at the mall's toilet but manage to get back PHEW.
3) Pierce my tragus earhole. Wooots! That might be my last piercing.
4) Some pervert guys / bastards wanttt to get close to me! OMG.
5) Gain some friends,lost some friends.
6) Enter the hospital for the first time.
7) Sick more than ever! D:
8) Crush on TangJiaMing, && Fall in love with him.
9) Got my itouch!
10) Make my family cried,and proud! :O
11) Slap my elder brother OMG. Guilityyyy.
12) Cried by listening a song.
13) Going oversea with classmates! Thailanddd! :D
14) Money come in when i have no money!

Hmm this is all of it? Hah!
Nah,where got so less! (: I'm lazyy to recall back.

Boyfriend ask if i got any resolutions for 2010
Oh goshh, I always say but never manage to get it at last.

Oh well,because i'm lazy you see! (:
I say i will but exactly i don't . ERHEM. Not what you think uh TJM. LOL

NOT GOING ITE,is one on my list.
BUYING NEW HANDPHONE IS ALSO ONE.
BUYING CAMERA ALSO ONE.
LOVING MY BOYFRIEND IS A MUST ON MY LIST.
GOING OVERSEA AFTER N level (Tryyy to?)
DON'T FALL SICK SO OFTEN.
&&& Try attend school everyday :/
&&&&& pianooooo! OMG want it badly ):

&
Helll,tomorrow i wake up. Mum and dad will be not around ):
Miss them ttm luh! School reopen is dadddy's birthday. Miss him already luh! ):
I'm wondering,am i missing my money or him? NAH . I MISS HIM not my money.

If reality hurts,i'm going to just keep running away.

2010-01-02T09:26:00.004+08:00

Going to drink my life away.

As per normal,school's going to start & have to drag myself to school everyday.
I swear i'm going to be late for school for many times next year. D: I don't careeeee anymore FYI. & I'm going to sleeeep the lessons awayyyy.

Innocence

2010-01-02T00:20:00.001+08:00

I think about the little things that make life great. This was suppose to be the best feeling.

I found a place so safe not a single tear, the first time in my life and now is so clear. This innocence is brilliant i hope that it would stay. I need you now. And i will hold on to it, don't you let it pass you by.

- use itouch/iphone to blogger

The sound of fireworks,the sight of it i still can remember very clearly

2010-01-01T05:13:00.000+08:00

Justttt got home not long ago!!
(: went to city hall to countdown. Alottt of people thanks to boyf to protect me :D love you.

Then after standing a veryvery long time we decided to just cross the road bit we were not allowed to. There were police abd securities. Weiqiang, junqiang and another guy got to cross the road while when i and byfriend wanted to cross the road we were stopped by the policewoman $&€{*}*}^#%! Hah

Then suddenly the crowd of people at the opposite side don't care the police and chiong across the road eveb police can't do anything about it. Then we alsi cross the road to another side. We squeeze and squeeze push here push there. Almost shout lor! Thennn we seee fireworks on a view that is so pathetic. But the view the sight was awesomeeeee!!

Loveeeee it! Until now still remember clearly.

Then jq want to play pool at bukit timah, but clement want tag along then we meet him after quite long then at last he joins his friends zzzz waste time. Then went to bukit batok to take cab to beauty world . But the pool was fully booked.

Chua zheng came and he take us to another but also close then went home. But it was fuxxking hard to find a xxxking cab at there and we need two. After very long then finally got one . Then reach home at 4.30plus?

Sunday going accompany boyfriend to plaza buy thing thennn monday send breakfastt LOL (: butbut i'm wondering what bag shoukd i take on monday. Parents going over on sunday. Dad's birthday just 3 more days. I'm going to take my new bag home when parents goes overseaaa. Third month just 6 days away.

- use itouch/iphone to blogger

Those fireworks in my heart.

2009-12-30T23:38:00.003+08:00

Haaaa,today went to Jurong Point as boyfriend wanted me to go and accompany him to buy things.

He wanted to buy bag,shoe,stationary,wallet.
I sms him the previous night,told him i will bring 100dollar to spend. But i don't want to spend all, in case i want to spend,stop me.
In the end, he encourage me by saying "BUY LA BUY LA"
LOL. Then make me spend all my money away. LOL.

I bought a new bag,water bottle & wallet.
& I WANT THAT FUCKING N97 mini / N97 when my contract endsss or my hp spoilsss! Or whennn i get good result forrr first class test,call mum help me buy! HEH!

Thennn this loving boyfriend of mine also bought the same design of bag & wallet with me,
My wallet is red,while he's green, my bag is brown while his black. But honestly my bag looks like black. LOL. Should have took white.

Tomorrow going countdown OMGOMG :D

Doesn't mean everyone need to see then it is call a blog.

2009-12-29T01:50:00.001+08:00

Just like love, doesn't need any reason to love or be loved.
Promise boyfriend next year to meet him everyday to go school everyday with his breakfast along. (:

Quite looking forward to a new year(: and mum let me go countdown! Omg that's soo shock cannn? She joked with me first with that fierce face and a CANNOT face.
Then after playing girlish attitude with her then she say kidding. She ask me is she so a strict mother meh? Lol! Sometimes maybe! haha but i love her ttm

And thanks to my dad, although at last he never help me ask mum to let me go countdown. But i use his powerful name to tell mum(:

And brothers disturbing me asking if he can tag along. Hahah 15 years with them isn't that bad afterall.

Next year probably going to spend lots of time with boyfriend :D But i still will loveeee my family and bestfriends ttm!

Belindaaaa, thanks for times when i fall yeah! I don't know how i can manage through the year without you! Love you ttm i hope next year will not be emoemo de hor! You emo i emo ! (: cause i sit beside you only! Thanks for some great advice through those times when i'm lost.

Leeying,this year i know we have alot of quarrels . And our friendship goes astray and fragile. Because of someone. But i promise you , we both will make things right next year! But i need your help too to make this friendship okay. Love you! I also dono if you will read this or not OMG.

Ginaaa, hahah rememberr we are in the same boat kay? I sink before i never want to see you sink but if you do i will mend the hole for you! Hahaha (: thanks for understanding me so much those times. Cause you know the two girls never know how it feels. Love you ttm! Haha hopeee next year will be better for you!

Tang Jiaming, hahaha i think you must be like "omg you got write my share too! I thought you write for those girls and never write mine" haha! You have been my boyfriend for almost 3 months. And everyday just getting more awesome with you. Although our journey is going to be a mystery we doesn't know, But i just want to enjoy the present with you(: and thanks for making me falling in love with you. :D love youuu. Thanks for helping me to get over my past when you say you doesn't mind(: thanks for letting me finding back myself.

Jonathan,i doesn't know if you will see my blog already or not? Ha, i doesn't know if i should really thank you or don't . Sometimes i like to thank you for letting me find such a good guy tang jiaming that i can cherish, and doesn't treat him like how i treated you. Sometimes i blame you for my past hunting me. But i don't anymore (: this year has been up and down with you but still like to thankyou and god for making my life interesting. Tyvm

And you all readers too! You make my life! (:
love ttm!

I'm dead,i'm fcuking dead gone.

2009-12-26T22:21:00.000+08:00

Just like a man asking forgiveness from a stone.

Reasons for taking my love away

2009-12-26T02:54:00.002+08:00

;过往的画面全都是我不对.
我伤你几回.
我站的方位跟你之间隔着泪
越来越远的道别
风竟一直在后退
而是我错误的机会.

Worst night ever.

Enjoy to the max

2009-12-25T03:25:00.003+08:00

Hah,today seriouslyyy enjoyed ttm siah! (:

At first,went to meet boyfriend at 5plus? Slack around some void deck.
Then went meet Jarrod at interchange then leeying came too. Called Cheekeong,Kerby & Shao
Still haven reach,so went plaza walk around to kill time.
Went garden plaza to meet ShaoHui & Kerby.
And that Cheekeong is the slowest among all . Make us wait like &*%@&%@$ years like this.
So took 75 down to bukit timah. Then overshot the place ._____.
And boyfriend know and never say LOL,then kerby ask boyfriend is it we overshot liao?
Then he say . Make us walkkkk a long way back ):

Then finally reach there liao,settle down for dinner.
They called alot of spicy food,i can't eat. Not feeling well. Heh (:
After dinner,they went toilet,then go IRC play 2hours of pool.

Then it was 11pm already,wanted go back plaza already,but big brother called
Ask me where am i,then i say bukit timah.
Then he say "let's play pool then,Call your friends along. I pay."
Went to ask boyfriend if he want,he was like ON LA!

Hah,of course. Free game for them what. O:
But then Leeying need go fetch her brother already,so accompany her to wait for Bus.
Went to Mac,then went meet brother. Jarrod,Kerby,Jiaming play quite a few rounds with Brother.
Okay,they never win my brother even one round LOL. Boyfriend actually got one round can win,but at last also lost. <: Then all of them just want keep trying to win my brother luh! LOL. But soon,brother need go off liao. Then he say next time then play with them. Went back 163 coffeeshop to slack. Reach home at 2.36am! Hah. Nice day uh!

A MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL OF YOU,READERS ♥!!

Nothing is impossible.

2009-12-22T00:03:00.001+08:00

In the middle of the night,midnight & i'm dropping a tear and i don't know why.
&&
I fcuking need $30 ):
Shyttt i neeed moneyyy
- use itouch/iphone to blogger

It's like a river of tears.

2009-12-20T12:50:00.002+08:00

Hey peepos :)
Yesterday went to Xavier's birthday party.
It's was aweeesome (:
The atmosphere was very good,including pool table & Karaoke.
At first me & belinda don't know what should we do siah.

Teach belinda abit of pool. Thenn..
Seeing all the boys playing pool -.-
After that Gina come liao,so we went to sing.

And they all keep forcing me to sing.
Then one by one go out play pool,left me,gina,belinda & junqiang at the room.
Sing Get High By FIR,damn high luh LOL.
Damn fun (: then went out to see the guys play pool.
Then boyfriend was playing table tennis. Lol he was very pro wor alot of people say x)

So went to play pool with Gina & Belinda,
They gang up okay to bully me,they go 2 times when i go 1 time only ):
And they keep saying i know how play. know how play so what.
You two got two brain together,i only have one brain. LOL

At last almost win them,so close to win them. But fail ):
Hahahah,so play afew rounds more,then play with boyfriend also the same
almost win him also Zzzzz. Maybe i just too bad mood to play.

Went home with Kerby & Boyfriend after that,slack at downstair coffeeshop.
Then went home at 1050plus? Hah slept at 2am? (:

P.s girls (belinda & gina)
; You need tell me when do you want play pool,i need tell my brother & ask about the price. (:

When we're together,we say it's love. When's over,we say it's silly.

2009-12-17T18:37:00.002+08:00

Should i say i'm really sick or what? >:

Keep coughing,and now i'm all left alone at home .
Feel like no energyyy.
But the house is creeepy when there's no one at home can!?
Don't dareeee to even do things that i want ):
Including sleeping. >:

Now i only can open my eyes and stay awake until brother's back from town.
I think that will be bloody long?
Anddd,i wanttt go HongKong afterrr exams.
It will be veryvery long. ): I mean the EXAMS.

Now i'm blastinggg my music at home . Wonder if outside people can hear it or not O:
I don't even care! :D

I'm rotting at home while..

TANG JIAMING IS HAVING FUN OUTSIDE. >:

Another night of love.

2009-12-17T01:12:00.001+08:00

Wars have shields
Guns have bullet proof to protect you. What about love?
Today have a great day with kunda and yiling at IMM. hahah. Wants to buy things but no money D:
Then spend the rest off the day with boyfriend :D
Going to xavier's party this saturday . Haha happy happy!
- use itouch/iphone to blogger

Chapter 5.

2009-12-14T20:00:00.000+08:00

Heyyy peepos :D these fews days were awesome with boyfriend around. I was bored to death at home. Hahah and i planning to buy iphone 3GS when my plan ends or in the mid year of next year i will end.
Changing back to M1 too. Hhahah parents let me buy but boyfriend like don't let me buy ): He keep bullying me uh. But still love him alot. I exactly can't wait for school reopen. Because i'm getting very bored with the holidays. Have already things for school except for converse black shoe. Not going to buy new bag yet until school reopen for months. (:

- use itouch/iphone to blogger

Rushing reality.

2009-12-12T11:42:00.003+08:00

Phew,these few days was very busy to buy books for next year.
Has been buying alot of assessment books to stress and prepare myself for next year!
Cannot afford to go ite, andand somebody say if i go ite he don't want me ):
So i cannot go ITE :D I think you all can guess who's the somebody.
He's very supportive wor! Don't let me spend money,don't let me take more than $10 go out.
Lols,cause i been spending alottttt on shopping. This month confirm got spend $500.
Next month still need go buy new clothes. LOL.
Thennn he don't let me this don't let me that. Wow . I love him ~
Thanks to his powerful words make me damn stress and force me to save money.
& He and me school reopen goinggg to studyyy every weekend.

He told me he wouldn't have time for me,oh well,i knew that. I'll try .
Cause i think i wouldn't have time too ): Goshhh,but nevermind.
Me & him will still be the same :D he treat me veryyy good (:

Another thing is,i'm thinking to drop Amaths
Because,keep failing is not solving the problem.
& Keep studying that subject and tuition for only that
& neglected other subject.
You just have to accept the fact that you can't do it.
So maybe i'm going to drop my Amaths.
Even my second brother seems fine with it.
He promised he will help me with Science & Maths & Humanities
Woots. :D

Mum promised me to help me with Chinese.
Lol,guess i need help English from my father.
:O Nah,his English is too powerful and chim for me.
Talk to him,Singlish = Die.
LOL. I bought assessment for every subject,
1 assessment for each subject except for history,i got 2.

Gonna chiong~

God send me an angel up from above to love me for life.

2009-12-08T18:24:00.002+08:00

Yesterday went to meet my girls to catch movie, New moon

I was late,i didn't take note of the time!
So i just rush it all,and went out to meet them
and both of them which is belinda & leeying wore totally black.
.____.
Wth,always black black black.
Then went meet Gina,luckily she wear white .
If not i odd one out.

Went to take 180 from interchange,we were damn crazy okayy!
On the bus,all disturb me when i was smsing boyfriend.
Reach jurong point went to buy tickets,manage to get tickets.
And they force me to sit at the most corner cause
They say when i cry i can lean on the wall. WHAT FRIENDS I HAVE.

LOL,went to eat . Only me and belinda eat. Other just took fruits.
Went to walk around,exactly wanted to play silent hill.But got people play
Then decided to after watching the movie then play :)

Went to watch the movie,the advertisement damn long can.
Damnnn long winded siah LOL

The movie was okay,but the guy behind keep kicking my seat .
-.- I stare at him and his girlfriend. Wtf can.
The ending was crapppp,they purposely do this type of ending
because they want you to catch eclipse ! ):

Hope it will come out by next year.
I rate the movie 4/5.

Went off to walk around,buy caramel frappe to drink .
Then slowly,Leeying's father call her,then follow by Gina's and Belinda's
And Mine. LOL Parents are all the same.

But Leeying ,most jialat. Cheerup. (:
Anything find me. Just 10 storeys different

Went popular as Belinda want to buy Breaking Dawn.
Then went home.Went to meet boyfriend and Kerby.
Belinda accompany me to there. Then she went home.
Slack awhile,then love purposely took my bag and put thing inside wor.
I was surprised :O , i thought this month i wouldn't get anything! :D
Didn't manage to give him his,cause i thought not going to meet him .
Love him :) Happy belated 2th month :D ♥

Went home,sprain my ankle ): Damn pain. Then my leg's skin came off and swollen.
Hell pain. I was touched by boyfriend's gift. Thankss i love it alot. :DD

Talked to mum,went to sleep at 2plus? :)

All i know is,

2009-12-06T12:24:00.002+08:00

Woke up several of times,
Gastric hurts like fcuk.
Still keep in silent.

Eaten gastric pills.Eaten medicine.
Eat abit,and drink lots of water.

Saw him,flashback that cause my headache.
Screaming,cried at a corner with no one at home,no one came to help.
Planning to go East Coast alone today.
That's all i can do now.
I feel veryvery cold,weak now,shivering while typing.
Cherish my this post okay! I have a hard time typing it out.
The mirror reflects, is not me anymore.

Where's my boyfriend?
I miss him..
I need him..
But am i forbidden to?

Let me fade away.

2009-12-05T19:50:00.003+08:00

Basically,today went to Malaysia with a big headache.
Reach there,shop around.
But until there vomited,terribly.
See doctor. Still feeling terrible.
No appetite to eat at all.

Have not eat yet. Guess i will just sleep it away.

I've not okay,inside or outside.
Feel like dying,what's the purpose of living.
I'm forgotten,
invisible,
thrown aside like a toy.
Nobody needs me,all alone.
Family getting not very well.

Totally stress.
Where are the promises.
Why am i sad now,

也许我忘了怎么笑.
Maybe this world can forget me.
Maybe you can forget me.

Is pride more important?

2009-12-04T20:57:00.003+08:00

Every single relationship,
is never been the same,except for one thing with the guys.
Pride.

Is Pride that important that you can hurt other people?
Even yourself.

Pride is the enemy,
Pride is what made you lost everything.
& you're letting it in.

Same hurts from pride.
Belinda.
I know guys are like this.
But then am i the one to be in fault for their pride?

That's are all excuses.
Take off your Pride mask.

It's hurtful,hurting.

希望你会找到我

2009-12-02T20:11:00.002+08:00

Hmmm,nothing much to post today,
Got abit of sore throat :D

But nevermind (: I love the overnight with the girls!
It was totally awesome,we talk till 6.00 am in the morning.
And watch The Notebook,i did cry! Gosh the movie is touching.

:D